Life Unplugged – Where Desperation Breeds Creativity and Freedom
It’s a funny feeling, just sitting here today with no connection to the world as I know it.
My mind has to drift back to early 2012 when I landed in London with a phone that did not work in Europe. SO I had no ability to use anything but Wi-Fi. And that was very spotty when living on the canals for those 8 days.
It was incredibly freeing, and at the same time it both forced and allowed deep creativity.
How does this connect to me today?
For most of this week our DSL, which is very slow Internet here on the farm, got slower, and slower, and slower. Two days in a row, I tried to load Amazon to get some cords ordered for a staff member to no avail.
Then on Thursday it just stopped. We ran diagnostics, reset devices, all the things they ask you to do and NOTHING.
I can say that some panic set in. I am working with our team back in the US that is leading the way to a Pack Walk, but with two months planning we are one week away from having our September walk as of tomorrow (typing this on Saturday, but won’t be able to publish it until Monday or Tuesday)
There is a deep need to reach out to them, check business emails, and connect. It’s just a day and age in society, where it would one would feel quite unplugged to have neither your phone going yet or any home internet to link up to.
So what did we do?
We ran to Nordby and used Wi-Fi in the supermarket so I could send panicked messages to a few staff members, and my mother who was expecting to Skype that day.
Why the panic?
Well, on the day the “net went down” ( modem issue per tech guy) I found out I was not getting my Swedish ID Number that would mean easier access to everything really. Healthcare, cell phone in my name, bank account in my name, and all the benefits of living in a great socialized country.
They don’t just give those numbers away. In our case we will need to show I was insured for a year on one of two plans and have income to support myself.
So I’m back to no insurance after finally being covered through the ACA and Medicaid expansion in the US. (All of us finally were covered together)
Since America is a country with healthcare not provided for all (yet) Sweden requires US immigrants to have coverage in this country that is paid for one year before they issue a number. Yep, one year.
Yeah, I know right.
Come on US; work with the rest of the world on making sure our own citizens get access to healthcare at any cost. We can prevent so much by having regular visits, and not waiting for the ER catastrophe.
So in the panic, with a letter stating we had till September 24th to get all documents in, and those were things we knew we would not have, we went to our worst-case scenarios.
The first involved me going back to the US and working half the year they’re on site and taking clients, and to managing it remotely the other half. I’d need a basement apartment or shack up with someone for 3 month bursts to make that work.
We were actually talking about me doing professional house sitting as much as I could those 3 months to not just pay rent, but make money. Our minds were churning in that panic stricken day. But it unlocked the beginning of new Solgave creativity.
You see we had been comfortable and not pushed out of our comfort zone yet. I know most are going, “WTF YOU WERE NOT OUT OF YOUR COMFORT ZONE YET!?” I mean we were not pushed spiritually to do any type of hard reset, or examine life with everything we knew stripped away and find the means to smile during that moment because our life would need to carry us through.
These tests seem to make or break relationships. If finances are holding you together, then when in those pressured situations many would break apart.
There are many things we could regret, but as my wife wrote about in her blog and we started reinforcing after reading the Four Agreements, you can’t relive mistakes more than the one time, or you are robbing yourself of life.
The truth is we are hard wired and set up from birth to run these programs over and over in our head. Punishing others and ourselves around us for mistakes. It makes sense logically to deal with mistakes one time, and move on, but the critical nature of most of us won’t allow it to end after one processing and assessment. Nope. We run it thousands of times.
In some it actually creates illness, that type of worry or fear driven thinking.
So with some heightened awareness, we realized that we couldn’t let fear rule our Mind of Law anymore. Our family would now face the possibility of being apart a portion of the year while juggling the international marriage woes.
With two young kids, I think the ante is upped on working on a solution where that is not the case. So with fear pushed aside, but a comfortable dose of pressure, we hold again and are reminded why we fell so deeply in love almost three years ago.
We are not driven by financial security; we are driven by spiritual and emotional freedom.
We are driven to create things, we are driven to be free, we are driven to work on the only thing we can change in life, ourselves, so that our children can be unlatched from genetic and environmental propensities of fear.
Now back to why I am writing this knowing it won’t post for a few days.
What did I do the first night with no Internet?
Again, outside of us on the boat (and that was time that flew by as our new love that seemed and felt so eternal was expressed in 3D for the first time) I can’t remember the last time this was a reality.
Normally I troll the Facebook and Instagram feeds as I lay down. I read Reddit and Digg stories, and maybe watch a short video. Then I put the phone down after reading myself to sleep with current articles and drift off.
That first night I was unsure what to do. I am sleeping in the spare room until we move that bed into our room so we can co-sleep safely and comfortably.
Well, we stayed up and turned on the TV and I watched David Letterman and a Swedish documentary. We had only had the TV on here for Gabi’s Disney shows and it felt good to just sit on the couch and be with everyone asleep.
Then the next day came.
OMG I can’t see if we got any bookings. I can’t see what is happening in about 6 work chats I have going. OMG!!
Well, it turns out the world kept on spinning.
I got out some daily spiritual books that have some Eastern Wisdom and started my day back with those. I pulled out the Bhagavad Vita and the Four Agreements and began reading.
Wow. We spent the morning reading the 4 agreements and how those really applied and affected ones life when living them.
I made a vow to write some blogs and not worry about publishing them that second. So here I am…
We spent the day delivering Gabi to her grandfather in Moss, Norway (about an hour drive) and it was almost overwhelming to be online two hours. Mainly because I knew I needed or could be 8-16.
I needed to get those cables ordered; I needed to respond quickly to all employee group and private chats. I scanned the most essential emails. Responded to one booking we got and had to make sure they were connected with the staff member handling that.
So many things have happened I think a family member was actually unsure that our DSL equipment failure was real! LOL.
“You lost the entire net?” was asked a couple of times with a tone of doubt.
You want to scream, “YES, this would not be made up and I’m bloody panicked about it!!! Thanks for feeling the pain!!”
Then I remember the agreements. It’s their Mind of Law that’s been created through a lifetime of conditions and choices made for them that create that reaction. It’s never my own.
That’s a big step for me, and a great place to be again.
Part of those agreements reminds you to not judge anyone, always do your best, not to react or take things personal, and never make assumptions.
Yes folks. In the midst of losing a MacBook I have had five years, selling everything we own to get here in time for my soul daughters school to start, we have faced several new challenges. Having this slow Internet go completely out the day I was notified I would not get a number and had only two weeks to prove things we could not prove was the final test of all tests.
The proverbial nail in the coffin that forced creativity and brought a new freedom and unity to this couple that have endured so much.
Never give up folks. Believe in each other. Lend a hand to those that need it. And smile as if it’s your last day alive, because one day, it will be.